The last few weeks.

Until yesterday, since about a week before Christmas, I had a husband that was home to help with the kiddos.  He worked a lot from home, but HE WAS HERE.  For breakfast, for poopy diapers, for rocking, for dinner, for the endless back and forth bedtime routine with Adalyn…for grocery shopping!!  Andrew gets insulted when I tell him that it felt like, for once, that I had a real partner in this whole parenting thing.  It hasn't always felt like that.  How could it when he is gone 16 hours a day?  Well, this week marked the return to reality as Andrew's last semester (last!) of grad school kicked off.   He was back on the 6am train and to make things all that much more wonderful, both girls have been sporting 102-104 fevers for the last oh say, 36 hours.  It's been a hard 2 days, mentally more than physically, I think.  I miss my partner.  The last 2 days I've run around like a chicken with my head cut off from bath time to a session, to answering an email, to wiping a bum…you get the idea. Even with my mom around to help out today, I just feel, um, "ahhhhhhhh".  So many feelings of CAN'T DO IT ALL.  WHERE DO I START? DID I SHOWER?  IS THAT POOP?  CRAP, I MISSED A CALL WITH A CLIENT.  DID I EVEN FEED HER LUNCH?

Sometimes I all too easily forget that God is walking all of this with me.  He hears my cries for help even when I'm not crying out for help.  I have a family member who I love more than anything that tells me that she has never heard God speak to her.  Well, yesterday, He spoke to me in an email from a dear, dear, friend.  Just out of nowhere, she sent me this email:

He tends His flock like a shepherd, He gathers the lambs in His arms, He  carries them close to His heart; (here comes a promise that brought me hope, relief, and healing)
> He gently leads those with young."

He speaks to you, just not always in the way we are listening for it.  And just like He tells me that I'm a good mother and that He is leading me and I'm not alone, He also tells me to keep pursuing my career dreams.

A lot has also happened for me professionally in the last days.  I was accepted into CMpro…a designation that I've yearned for since I starting my business mid 2012.  I had a feature in the Clickin Moms email that goes out to hundred of thousands of people, and a feature over on the National Association of Professional Child Photographers (NAPCP)….http://www.napcp.com….umm my face is on their front page!! And just this Saturday, I drove up to MA to work with one of the most incredible newborn photographers in the country. I have no doubt that this is what I'm supposed to be doing, but I also know that my family life is always to be the priority.  I'm hoping that a move to more newborn and maternity photography will allow me to have many more weekends with family and just a few shoots of cute little babies during the week.  We are also hoping/praying that the job Andrew accepts in May is also something that will allow him to balance family and work.  We had some great family time in the last 10 days.

The last days with Daddy were spent attempting potty training (a sort of FAIL, but we're getting there. I just need more sleep to deal with the frustrations).

And working on our solid food consumption.

More poopin on the potty...

And playing in the snow.

Eloise is becoming a feisty little one. 

Do NOT take her toy away from her. 

I dare you to take it.

Call me baby one more time...

Neither of the girls were into sledding.  Definitely WAY too cold.

But the aquarium was a hit. :)  

Here's to hoping the girls are feeling better tomorrow so we can GET OUT OF THE HOUSE.

Elles Belles, 9 months

Dearest Eloise,

Forgive me for this post.  There were multiple attempts at getting your 9 month photos, but this is what I have.  There were days when we ran out of light, days when your sister wanted attention, days of mommy having the stomach bug, and then there was this.  You woke up late from your afternoon nap and if I waited to nurse you, I would have run out of light again.  You didn't like this, but I kind of like these images.  Sorry.  I love you.

As you can see in the top picture, your two teeth have really grown in and I think your top ones are going to break through soon.  Despite these images, you really are the happiest baby I have ever met.  You still sleep in your crib from about 7am-5am and then usually go back to sleep until 7:30 or so.  You take a one hour morning nap around 10 and the typically another around 2.

You are standing, and at only 15lbs 7 oz, your Daddy and I think you are going to be the tiniest baby that ever walked.  Even though you are just in the 5th percentile in weight, you are tall like the rest of your family and in the 75th percentile.  Future supermodel, perhaps?

You sure have your casual glance at the camera down.

And you love yourself.  You frequently kiss your flection in the door.  hehe

 And those baby blues?  Watch out, world!

Seriously, you and your sister's eyes!!! My Goodness.

Oh my, Adalyn and Eloise, you two are going places - and going places together.  2 peas in a pod you are.  

xoxo Mommy

Year in Review

I think, if I had to pick just one of the past (almost) 29 years, 2013 would have to be it.  It was crazy busy and crazy FULL - full of so many wonderful and amazing moments, hugs, first breaths of life, a birth of a sisterhood, and a fulfillment of a dream.  We are so blessed and I am thankful and ready to see what this year has to bring!

We all know that I'm a goal setter and planner, but I made only one resolution for 2014 - more quality time with the family.  The first step in this for me was to stop wasting precious time on Social Media!! This meant deleting the Facebook app on my phone so that I can no longer scroll through my newsfeed when "bored" or need a distraction.  Instead, when I feel like doing something like checking FB even on my computer (which I've limited to 3 newsfeed checks daily), I'm going to use those moments to pray for someone I love, or use those times to work more efficiently.  It's such a black hole for me because I am connected to so many other photographers around the world and I love seeing their work, and love seeing what my friends are up to, but it seriously did become a problem for me last year.

Although looking back at the progression of my 365 progression bring warms fuzzy feelings in my heart, I decided not to do one this year.  It just became another thing for me to feel bad about not getting done, and didn't seem to inspire any real creativity (which was the initial purpose).  Here it is, with many days missing, and some images uploading with weird color space issues….hopefully it brings a smile to your heart as well.